Are You Worthy of Love?
Written by Marina Blocker
My whole life I’ve been trying to prove worthy to be loved. first, it was with my parents, trying to be the most well behaved little girl. Then it was with my siblings, trying best to be the upstanding older sister by proving love for them and making sure I was there for them whenever they needed the most. Even when wrong things were done to me, or someone did not provide the same love and support provided to them. My own children took advantage of the love provided, though, I tried to be the best mom at school and home, they would often be disrespectful.
It was also friends, I wanted them to see the worthiness that was given for their friendship, so I would do anything in my power to show them that I really cared. Lastly, it was relationships, I would try to be the best girlfriend providing loyalty and being there for them in every way possible, even when compromising myself to make them happy. Even though they were doing wrong things to me or weren’t being good friends, being worthy of my love and loyalty, it compromised me.
Today, there’s still a struggle inside with the concept of putting happiness first, I keep requiring people put the same amount of effort keeping me loving them. I’ve never chosen myself, I’ve always chosen someone else, it’s still an ongoing struggle, trying to teach people how to be good to me.
I know it’s hard not to stay in an unhealthy relationships sometimes, especially, when you love someone, but there is an unrecognized reason to love yourself first. It’s important to stop trying to get love from other people. It’s still very much a struggle for some people, however, everyday you need to try to be the best you can for yourself and no one else. In the end, You need to choose you.